Nobody likes looking back at a decision and thinking “Why did I agree to that?” Yet we all do it. After spending years helping big names like IBM and Verizon figure out what makes people tick, Adriana Delor got tired of watching smart people give little thought to how seemingly unnoticeable interactions affect us greatly. She decided to start to bring our attention to some of these basics, starting with why we say “Yes” when we really want to say “No”.
Understanding the Subtle Influences
Most of us think we’re in control of our decisions. But Adriana knew something different when building things for millions of customers. “We say yes to things we later regret because we’ve been subtly influenced by powerful psychological forces that operate beneath the surface of our interactions,” she points out. It’s not about being weak-minded – it’s about being human.
After years of observation, according to Adriana, here are three key factors that influence your decisions:
The Cookie Effect
Ever had someone do you a small favor and you suddenly felt like you owed them? That’s not an accident. “The principle of reciprocity: we feel obligated to return favors even if we didn’t ask for them,” Adriana explains. She’s seen it work with everything from sharing contacts after a networking event to offering customers a small reward – even a cookie. That nagging feeling that you need to pay back a favor? There’s a reason marketers and salespeople have been using this trick for years.
The White Coat Effect
Think you’re immune to authority? Think again. Adriana cuts through the noise: “We tend to obey authority figures even when they ask us to do things we wouldn’t normally do.” Like at the doctor’s office, we nod along to instructions without asking questions. The power of authority runs deep, and it affects us more than we realize – from purchasing decisions to how we feel after watching the news on social media.
The Mirror Effect
Here’s a trick car salespeople often use: find something in common with the customer. “We are more likely to be persuaded by people we like,” Adriana explains. “We’re more likely to say ‘yes’ to someone we find attractive, friendly or similar to ourselves.” Smart parents have known this forever – that’s why they get someone their kid admires to deliver tough messages. Companies often miss this one, focusing much more on sales and performance metrics than on their relationship with the people, inside and outside of their firm.
Reinventing The Reflex
Adriana keeps it simple: “Take a moment to reflect.” Pause. Knowing these hidden influences helps you make good choices when it matters.
These aren’t just tricks for the business side of the world – they’re also wake-up calls for anyone who’s ever wondered why they agreed to something they didn’t want to do. Perhaps more awareness on both ends can further the agenda on both ends: companies and groups with an agenda can take advantage of more tools and people can allow persuasion with consent.
Explore Adriana Delor’s LinkedIn profile or website to dive deeper into these factors and discover strategies to overcome them and take control.
